Coping with Grief
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It would take me a century to convey all the wonderful things about you so that others could even begin to fathom how great of a loss this truly is. However, I figured I could give an insight as to some of my favorite things about you:
Your honesty and your expectation for the same. You always taught me that being honest was the best policy. I appreciate growing up that I never had to fear telling you anything; nothing was off-limits. We told each other things that most mothers and daughters might not share with each other. You knew that if I said I was, “going to sleepover at so and so’s house” that meant it was a party. Your advice was always “Be smart, don’t do anything stupid, and call me if you need me for ANY reason.” I loved that I didn’t have to lie to you.
Your loyalty to your family and friends. You were fiercely loyal to those you loved. If someone needed you, you were there. You defended anyone who needed it, whether it was family, friends, or a coworker. There was that time in elementary school (where you worked) that you cornered a kid after they called me a “bastard” and told them they couldn’t talk to me that way and they needed to apologize. Another time in middle school when I was being bullied and you fought with the administration to make sure that it stopped (which it did.) I appreciate that you always showed up for me and I could count on you for anything.
Your sense of humor. Oh my word, did we ever laugh! We have so many inside jokes. We also quickly realized that we couldn’t carry anything together because one of us would get the other laughing and something would get dropped and you usually had to run to the bathroom before you peed your pants.
Your unwavering love. You loved with your whole heart. There was never a day, even if we got mad at each other (which rarely happened) that I had to question if you loved me or my children. Despite many ups and downs in life, your love for your family and friends never changed, even if some of the relationships did. You were a very special person and we loved you very much.
There are a million more qualities about you that I could list, but then we would be here
forever, and I think people would stop reading at some point.
I don’t know how I am supposed to do this life without you. The hardest part is not being able to talk to you. I know that from where you are now, you can see and hear everything, but it isn’t the same as being able to pick up the phone or drive to your house and talk to you in person. Mia is constantly doing something cute (or not so cute) and Jax always has something funny to say (he got that from you) and it kills me that I can’t share that with you.
I miss you. Jax misses you. A piece of my heart will forever be missing. I love you so much. Save a spot for me.
Love you to the moon and back!
Jessah Jo, Jess, Roo, Babygirl
Danica Day was a collector (a.k.a. hoarder) of many things including antiques, rocks, and quilts. She enjoyed reading, gardening, arts and crafts, and adventuring with her nephews and grandson. She had the ability to connect with anybody and was blessed with the gift of gab (she befriended a Mennonite woman and was able to exchange information so that she could get baked goods and sewing projects from her.) She had a major sweet tooth. She enjoyed cooking and baking. She made the best gravy. You could always find chocolate or some type of candy in her purse. And let’s not forget the Mountain Dew. Her favorite phrase, “I’ll give you anything you want except my last can of Mountain Dew.” She was an animal lover and couldn’t stand to watch or hear any animal being hurt. She enjoyed all kinds of music. Her tastes were very eclectic from rock to country, jazz, pop, and anything in between. I will never not think of my mom when I hear a Prince, Madonna, or Bob Seger song. Or any 80s music. She was creative. Most of the decorations she owned were ones she made herself. One of her favorite things was to do arts and crafts whether it was with kids, the elderly, or the mentally disabled. Her favorite television was anything DIY, true crime, or sports. She was an avid MN sports fan and on any given night you could find her cheering for her favorite teams from the comfort of her home. (Go Vikings, Twins, and Wild!) She was a spitfire. Mia has developed the same spiciness (as my mom would call it) as my mom herself. My mom could be stubborn and hard-headed. If she didn’t want to do it, she wasn’t going to. She looked for the practical solutions to problems, but also was very in tune with her emotions. She was of the “kill them with kindness” mindset. While she loved deeply, she would fight for you just as hard. She always showed up for you and made sure to tell you how proud she was. She gave the best hugs, cracked the best jokes, and genuinely cared for each person that crossed her path in life. She will be missed by many and forgotten by none.
She was preceded in death by her mother, Georgia Snider, her aunt Margery Snider, her cousin Michael Heichert, her nephew Ian Decker, her second parents Terry and Carol Smalley, and her special friends Don Guthrie and Doug Neiberger.
She is survived by her daughter Jessah (Larry) Schnack and her grandchildren Jax and Mia; her nephew Charlie (a.k.a. Boog) Decker and her great nephew Maxten; her brother Stephen (Kim) Decker and nephew Tyler (Kaity) and niece Cheri; her sister Darcie (Joe) Mitchell and nephew Nick; her father Charles Decker; her second family the Smalleys- Randy Smalley, Jeremy (Melanie, Ava, Ella) Smalley, Leah (Tony, Katreana, Mason) Brehm and many more family and friends.
A Celebration of Life will be held in the spring. Date and location to be determined. Please wear pink in her honor as that was her favorite color.
A private family event will be held in the near future to commemorate her memory. Details to follow.
In lieu of flowers, please make a donation in her honor to either the American Cancer Society or a local Humane Society.
Friends and family may offer condolences online at www.hulkefamilyfh.com.
Hulke Family Funeral Home & Cremation Services, 3209 Rudolph Road, Eau Claire, WI 54701 is assisting the family with the arrangements.